Short answer: yes, in California you can care for a body at home after death, and you don't need a funeral director to do it. The state's Cemetery and Funeral Bureau says families doing home death care must file a death certificate, get a disposition permit, get a casket or other suitable container, and arrange the cemetery, crematory or hydrolysis facility, and that they're not required to embalm or refrigerate. The caveat: the clock is real. The death must be registered within eight days and before disposition, and the body will change. This is California law; other states differ. Not legal advice.
This guide covers the hands-on part: washing, dressing, keeping the body cool, and holding a vigil. For the very first calls and paperwork, start with what to do in the first hour after a death.
Is this legal where you are?
In California, yes. The Funeral Consumers Alliance lists nine states that require families to use a funeral director for some or all of the process: Connecticut, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Louisiana, Michigan, Nebraska, New Jersey and New York. California isn't one of them.
Who gets to decide? Under California's Health and Safety Code 7100, the right to control disposition goes first to an agent named in a power of attorney for health care, then the surviving spouse, then the majority of adult children, then parents, and so on down the line. If you're not that person, get their OK before you start.
What California requires
The Cemetery and Funeral Bureau's consumer guide lists four things for home death care:
- File a death certificate with the local registrar. The attending physician or coroner signs it.
- Get a permit for disposition from the local registrar.
- Get a casket or other suitable container.
- Make arrangements with the cemetery, crematory, hydrolysis or reduction facility.
The deadline: every death must be registered with the local registrar within eight calendar days and before any disposition. Separately, the person with the duty of burial who fails to do it "within a reasonable time" commits a misdemeanor (HSC 7103). The law doesn't give a fixed number of hours. Plan for days, not weeks.
If the death was unexpected, stop here and follow the first-hour guide before you move or wash anyone.
Gather your supplies first
The Funeral Consumers Alliance's home funeral steps start with gathering supplies for washing, dressing, cooling and casketing or shrouding, and setting up a table, massage table or adjustable bed as a work area. A basic kit:
- Disposable gloves and a waterproof pad or sheet
- Basins of warm water, mild soap, soft cloths and towels
- Clean clothes, or a linen or cotton sheet for a shroud
- Dry ice and insulated gloves, or a way to keep the room cold
- Absorbent pads for the bed or table
Washing and dressing the body
FCA notes that hospice or hospital staff often help prepare the body, and that a funeral director can wash and dress the body and bring it back home if you'd rather not. If you're doing it yourselves:
- Go slowly. There's no emergency now. Talk to them while you work, if that feels right.
- Wear gloves. Use the recommended hygienic practices FCA describes: gloves, clean water, clean cloths.
- Wash gently, a section at a time, keeping the rest covered for dignity.
- Dress them in something they'd have chosen. Loose clothes are easier; you can cut garments up the back.
- Lay them out on a bed, table, or in the container or shroud.
If it helps, add something to the water that smells like them or their garden: a few sprigs of rosemary or lavender. That part's for you. Our piece on plants at the deathbed has more on herbs in the dying room.
Keeping the body cool
California doesn't require refrigeration in home death care, but keeping the body cool buys you time. FCA's guidance: use open windows, dry ice, Techni Ice and/or air conditioning to cool the body for up to three days. Turn the room's heat off and keep the door closed.
The Bureau's guide is blunt about the rest: "Each body decomposes at its own rate," and in home care you should "be prepared to care for your loved one." Watch for changes and have your disposition booked.
Dry ice safety
Dry ice is frozen carbon dioxide, and it can hurt you. The University of Virginia's environmental health and safety office lays out the rules in its dry ice safety guide:
- Ventilate. Carbon dioxide gas can build up in closed spaces and displace oxygen. Keep the room aired out. Never use it in a closet or small closed space. If you drive with it, keep it out of the passenger cabin and the windows open.
- Never seal it in. Don't put dry ice in a tightly sealed container; the gas needs to escape, and a sealed container can pressurize.
- Never touch it bare-handed. Use loose, insulated gloves or tongs. Thin nitrile gloves aren't enough, and skin contact causes severe frostbite.
Holding the vigil
This is why you're doing this. FCA suggests sitting with the body to say goodbye, reading, praying or meditating, playing music, sharing stories, and gathering friends to decorate the casket or shroud. Keep the room cool, the lights low and the door open to whoever needs a minute. Our guide to sitting vigil covers the hours before death; most of it works after, too.
Candles are lovely, but if anyone in the house used medical oxygen, put it away or use battery candles; Mass.gov fire guidance warns that oxygen makes fires burn hotter and faster.
Getting the body to its final place
FCA notes that in most states families can transport the body themselves with the proper paperwork, in a closed vehicle big enough for a coffin-sized box or a body lying flat. Keep the permit and death certificate with you. If you'd rather hand off at this point, see arranging care of the body. If you're choosing a greener disposition, see eco-friendly cremation and our green burial guide.