An obituary is a short published notice that announces a death, honors the person’s life, and shares service details, and writing one well means capturing who they were while deliberately leaving out the personal data that fraudsters use to steal a deceased person’s identity. You do not need to be a writer to produce a meaningful obituary, and a simple structure makes it manageable during a hard time. This guide gives you that structure, a template, and a clear list of what to omit for safety.
What an obituary is for
An obituary serves three purposes at once: it informs the community of the death, it celebrates the person’s life and relationships, and it communicates practical details such as the service time and how to give condolences or donations. A good obituary balances these, giving readers both the facts they need and a true sense of the person. It can be brief or detailed, formal or warm, depending on the person and your wishes.
What to include
A clear, complete obituary generally covers these elements:
- The person’s full name, age, and city, and the date of death.
- A brief life summary: where they were born, lived, worked, and what they cared about.
- Surviving family members and those who preceded them in death, named as you wish.
- A few personal touches: passions, humor, accomplishments, or a defining quality.
- Service details: the date, time, and place of any funeral, memorial, or celebration of life.
- Memorial preferences, such as a charity for donations in lieu of flowers.
You control how much to share, and a shorter notice is perfectly appropriate.
A simple obituary template
You can adapt this structure to any tone:
“[Full name], [age], of [city], passed away on [date]. [He/She/They] was born on [year, optional] in [place] to [parents, optional]. [One or two sentences on their life, work, and what mattered to them.] [He/She/They] is survived by [names and relationships]. [Optional: preceded in death by …]. [A sentence capturing their character or a favorite memory.] A [service type] will be held at [place] on [date and time]. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that donations be made to [organization].”
Fill in what fits, and leave out anything that does not.
What to leave out to prevent identity theft
Obituaries are a known hunting ground for identity thieves, who use the details to open accounts or commit fraud in the deceased person’s name. Protect the estate by omitting:
- The full date of birth, especially combined with the birthplace. Listing only the year, or no birth date, is safer.
- The mother’s maiden name, a common security question answer.
- The home address or specific street.
- Exact daily details that reveal when a home will be empty during the service.
You can write a warm, complete obituary without any of these. The FTC and consumer advocates recommend limiting personal identifiers in public death notices precisely to reduce fraud risk.
Where to publish
Obituaries can be placed in local newspapers, on the funeral home’s website, and on dedicated online memorial platforms, each of which may charge a fee, often based on length. The funeral home can usually help place the obituary as part of its services. Posting on social media is also common, with the same caution about omitting sensitive details. Publish once service details are confirmed so readers have the information they need.
An obituary checklist
- Draft the notice using the template, in your chosen tone.
- Include name, life summary, family, personal touches, and service details.
- Add memorial or donation preferences if you wish.
- Remove full birth date, mother’s maiden name, and home address.
- Choose a recent, representative photo.
- Publish through the newspaper, funeral home, or memorial site.
Frequently asked questions
What should be included in an obituary? Include the person’s name, age, city, and date of death, a brief life summary, surviving and predeceasing family, a few personal touches, service details, and any memorial or donation preferences. Keep it as brief or detailed as you wish.
What should you NOT put in an obituary? Leave out the full date of birth, the mother’s maiden name, the home address, and details that reveal when the home will be empty. These are commonly used for identity theft, and a warm obituary does not need them.
Can writing an obituary lead to identity theft? It can, if it includes personal identifiers like a full birth date, birthplace, and mother’s maiden name, which fraudsters use to impersonate the deceased. Omitting those details while still honoring the person greatly reduces the risk.
Where do you publish an obituary? Common options are local newspapers, the funeral home’s website, and online memorial platforms, often for a fee based on length. The funeral home can usually help with placement. Social media is also used, with the same privacy cautions.
Let Otherside help you honor them safely
Writing an obituary that captures a life while protecting the estate is a delicate task. Otherside offers obituary prompts and templates, an identity-safety checklist, and help with placement, so you can focus on the words that matter. See how Otherside helps.
Sources
This article is for general educational purposes. Otherside provides coordination; regulated services are delivered by licensed third-party providers.
